What's this about?

Ladies and gents our story begins with our author who one day packed up his bags to spend the next 5 years of his life on some tropical island far far away. This land is not like any place he has ever been to before. There is no telling of what he may encounter during his stay there but one thing is sure he is going to be in for one crazy adventure. And this is where you get to read about it.

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Readers beware!

The stories told here maybe appear larger than in real life and at times may even appear outlandish. However, all actual events are in fact real (well, most of them). What may appear as a distortion of reality to some may only be due to the author's perspective of the actual events. Some say he is just not right in the head.

Monday, January 09, 2006

Trust me, there's no need to tell me

"Oh, so you are by yourself here. You don't have a girlfriend. It must get really boring and lonely for you..." For some reason a couple of girls have come up to me and have basically told me something similar along those lines. Ok, you know what? Maybe it does get a little boring and lonely at times but you don't need to remind me of it. I guarantee you I'm quite fully aware of my current situation. Thanks. Sheesh.

Anyway, it's not like I'm really all that lonely. I'm a grown man not some little mamma's boy. I can handle being by myself. I just can't be locked up in a little room like some animal. All I need is to get out once in a while, especially from here. Then I'll be just fine.

There is no need to reiterate the 'not having a girlfriend' part either. Yes maybe it would be nice to have someone you could depend on for company. Especially on those long vacations where I'm just sitting here in my concrete cell by myself while everyone else is busy with their family or significant others. Even if we couldn't go out all that often it might be nice just to have someone I could count on for support. Then when things go wrong maybe they wouldn't seem so bad. It would also be nice to have someone to speak to face to face once in a while. Instead of some myna bird that hasn't even learned how to say one word yet.

Then again, what am I talking about? I must be going crazy. At least no myna bird will ever criticize me or nag me about "why don't you always call me?" Because I'm a busy man. I'm in med-school not pre-school. I got things to do. Plus, girls equal money. You pay for her dinner, maybe some flowers, her movie tickets, her day at the spa. I'm not rich. I don't got a job here. I'm eating cheese sticks for breakfast that should tell you something. And I don't need someone who always wants to be so close to me or holding my hand as I'm walking around either. It's hot as hell out here. The extra body heat is not going to help. Learn to keep your distance, woman.

If I really need someone to talk to I'll call up one of them psychic friend hotlines. And if I need just a body then I could always take up that governor on his offer of some young thing who's as he says "never been touched, never been kissed." No, no, no. I'm just kidding about that last sentence. I'm not about to do something that will have me spending my first few weeks once I return back to the States in some jail cell. So no need to start calling the CIA agents on me now. I'm already tired of living in the cell I'm in now.

Anyway, like I was saying I don't need no one or no body...
I'm just fine with the way it is now...
Just me and my bird...
No, really I am...


Anonymous Anonymous said...

And I don't need someone who always wants to be so close to me or holding my hand as I'm walking around either.

Learn to keep your distance, woman.
- OPO.. =p

8:30 PM  

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