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Ladies and gents our story begins with our author who one day packed up his bags to spend the next 5 years of his life on some tropical island far far away. This land is not like any place he has ever been to before. There is no telling of what he may encounter during his stay there but one thing is sure he is going to be in for one crazy adventure. And this is where you get to read about it.

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Readers beware!

The stories told here maybe appear larger than in real life and at times may even appear outlandish. However, all actual events are in fact real (well, most of them). What may appear as a distortion of reality to some may only be due to the author's perspective of the actual events. Some say he is just not right in the head.

Monday, December 26, 2005

Is there a doctor in the house?

I'm hurting. I'm hurting bad. My throat is sore, my muscles are aching, I'm feeling a little hot, and I think I look as bad as I feel. I can feel this big lump on the left side of my neck. (Would that indicate a swollen parotid gland, guys? Someone fill me in here.)

I got that family reunion to go to today too. That's why I got all them gift baskets. Well, if I don't go then I won't have to starve. It's funny how things work out sometimes. Then again I'll still probably end up stopping by there just for a few minutes at least.

Would I go to the hospital though if I got any worse? I don't know about that one. I've heard the stories from the clerks here and if the doctors end up treating me as well as they do in class, then I'm better off staying here.

The nurse would probably come in as I'm already nearing death,
"Sir, the doctor said he will be here in 15 minutes."
"But you said that an hour ago."
"I know sir, but he said there is a long line at Starbu... I mean at the tollgate."
"Son of a %!@&#."

I'll manage it by myself some how. Anyone know what the initial symptoms of bird flu are?


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