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Ladies and gents our story begins with our author who one day packed up his bags to spend the next 5 years of his life on some tropical island far far away. This land is not like any place he has ever been to before. There is no telling of what he may encounter during his stay there but one thing is sure he is going to be in for one crazy adventure. And this is where you get to read about it.

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Readers beware!

The stories told here maybe appear larger than in real life and at times may even appear outlandish. However, all actual events are in fact real (well, most of them). What may appear as a distortion of reality to some may only be due to the author's perspective of the actual events. Some say he is just not right in the head.

Tuesday, August 29, 2006


Last Monday night...
Text: "H!"

Text: "H! Guv evening pho..."

Text: "Hello pho.."

Monday morning...
Text: "Gud morning pho...."
My reply: "Good morning. So who is this?"

Text: "i'm liza.. Sorry f i disturb u..anu pla name m?"
My reply: "Liza who? Do I know you from some where? I'm assuming you know who I am since you have my number."

Text: "La, pho bngay lang skin..XENcya na poh u pla anu name m?"

Text: "Bkt d kna reply!h! im fr..Binan laguna. U?"

Text: "N0pe t0 tel u h0nesty i d0nt really n0w u p0h..i just guess it...s0 f u d0nt mind can we be friends? Bag0 lng kc sim q n im l0oking 4 a new frend..i h0pe mgte2xtbk kpa..tnx"

It's not unusual here to receive a text message to your cell phone from someone you don't even know saying "good morning" or "good evening". People do it out here all the time in the hopes that someone will respond back wanting to be their "textmate", not even knowing if the number they just dialed is active or not.

I for one don't really care for a textmate, especially if it is someone I don't know. So when I got that first text message last night I simply ignored it, figuring if I don't respond the person will just stop. But then I got two more text that night and one again the following morning. I found it a little surprising that all the text messages so far had been in English as well. I figured who ever this person was must know me some how. So I decided to finally text back to see who it was. And then she started to play that game as if she didn't know me at all. My surgery grades maybe low but my IQ isn't that low, missy. There were way too many clues indicating this was no random number text.

First of all, she texted me 4 times before I gave her a response. If you are dialing a random number you're not going to waste 4 text messages over a 12 hour period to see if someone texts you back. Also her first 5 text were all in English until I mentioned what a coincidence it is. Then all of a sudden she texts me in Tagalog? Yeah, nice way of trying to play that off now. And what a coincidence it is that she lives in Binan, the same town that I do. Later on she would call me "sir" however, I didn't even tell her I was a man or give her my name. Ok, there is a possibility this can all be coincidental but I don't think so. With that kind of luck she should play the lottery or have her own psychic hotline.

You know if she just told me how she knew me or who she really was I would have probably entertained her messages. I don't mind really mind listening to people. In fact I think it might be a problem of mine. No matter who it is I'll stop to listen to them, old ladies I've just met who want to tell me their problems, bums off the street wanting to tell me how they got there, or Mitch wanting to tell me the same story over in 3 different ways. I figure they just need to talk and have someone listen so if I'm not doing anything, I don't mind giving them a bit of my time.

But if you are going to text me trying to pretend you don't know me when you clearly do it makes you sound like a stalker or a psycho... Or both. I've dealt with enough crazies in my life already. I don't need any more. And how the hell are you going to ask me to be your friend when the first thing you did was lie to me? Yeah, that's how I like all my friends to be. This is like the third time this has happened to me so far. The sad thing is I think I'm really easy to approach so I don't know why people feel like they have to try and run this game on me.

Ladies if you want to talk to me just feel free to walk up to me when you see me and say hello. I'm really easy, more like a tramp.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

hello guys...im looking for a boy or bi na katxt,or gustong magpamssage,.im a masseur..or more than that..no gays and girls ok...txt me po..09471416999..laguna area lang po!laguna area lang po!

8:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

laguna area lang po..09471416999..para sa mga lalaki or bisexual na gustong magpamassage at mktxt or higit pa dun..hintay ko txt mo..tnx

8:17 AM  

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