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Ladies and gents our story begins with our author who one day packed up his bags to spend the next 5 years of his life on some tropical island far far away. This land is not like any place he has ever been to before. There is no telling of what he may encounter during his stay there but one thing is sure he is going to be in for one crazy adventure. And this is where you get to read about it.

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The stories told here maybe appear larger than in real life and at times may even appear outlandish. However, all actual events are in fact real (well, most of them). What may appear as a distortion of reality to some may only be due to the author's perspective of the actual events. Some say he is just not right in the head.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Fanciful Gluttony

It was titled as the longest buffet in the world.
350 Meter Buffet Table
400 Different Dishes
36 Restaurants
10 International Cuisines
Where did it take place? At Eastwood City, one of the country's premier shopping centers.

I had had a light breakfast and lunch so that I would have room to stuff my self for this coming winter. When I got there I went wild, grabbing one entree after the other with no constraint pushing old ladies and little kids out of the way. Hey, survival of the fittest. My plates were filled with Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Italian, Persian, American entrees. You name it I got it. There would be no discrimination from me. The Japanese sushi was mingling with the Italian pasta and the Chinese fried rice all on one plate, I didn't care. We can all get along. When I got to my table with my mountain sized servings in my hands I commenced as if I was in one of those pie eating contest. Devouring everything on one dish and then moving on to the next as if I was just breathing it in. By the time the night was over I probably ate enough to feed five Filipino families for the next three weeks... Well, that's what happened in my alternate reality anyway. Shit, that was what was supposed to happen for real.

Real World Reality:
The world's longest buffet? It was more like the world's shortest in more ways than one. My cousins and I had bought tickets for this "once in a lifetime event" that was supposed to last from 9 pm to 12 midnight. We got there at 10 pm, according to Filipino time standards we were early, but the buffet tables were already bare. Practically all that was left was some fired rice, French fries and ice-cream. What the #$%@?

Now, I'm thinking the organizers for this event either greatly underestimated the bellies of the Filipino people or were just complete #$%@!^* morons. I'm guessing it is the latter. Turns out they had sold 10,000 tickets for this event. However, talking with the restaurant managers they were apparently unaware that there was going to be this many people. Originally they were told it was supposed to only last from 7 pm to 9 pm, in which they sold 5,000 tickets for. In the last couple of days leading up to the event the organizers had sold another 5,000 tickets and set another time for a second buffet from 9 pm to 12 midnight, in which we got our tickets for. So by the time we got there at 10 obviously there was no more food and the restaurants did not have enough supplies to restock the tables. I don't know what the hell these organizers were thinking. Filipinos may be small but they can EAT. Hell, most of them never know when their next meal is coming. What do you expect?

In my opinion some one should be getting fired for this. People were getting up set. You thought the people here were upset with the president? At one table if that security guard wasn't there I'm sure those workers would have been stoned to death. Having sold 10,000 tickets for the event they should have know that they are going to need a crap load of food but instead they tried to get by with what was meant for only half the number of people.

Only in the Philippines.


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